I’m not holding my breath on that last one. But you get my point.

And so, I cling to Scripture and I wait. I wish I had some great spiritual insight for you, but I’m waiting for that myself. Today I’ll simply share with you some things straight out of the Bible that help with waiting.

I wait for the Lord, my soul waits,
And in His word I do hope.
My soul waits for the Lord
More than those who watch for the morning—
Yes, more than those who watch for the morning. Psalm 130:5&6

My favorite part of these words is the second line, in which the psalmist says “and in His word I do hope.” Y’all, God’s Word is full to overflowing with the promises of God. In His Word we really do have hope. Why would we not put all of our trust in the hope of the Lord’s Word? This, friends, is totally where I am. Just clinging to verses like these as I myself wait for the Lord?

In fact, the psalmist here is exhorting his hearers to wait,

Wait on the Lord;
Be of good courage,
And He shall strengthen your heart;
Wait, I say, on the Lord! Psalm 27:14

Make me to know your ways, O Lord; teach me your paths. Lead me in your truth and teach me, for you are the God of my salvation; for you I wait all the day long. Psalm 25:4-5

These are steadily becoming some of my favorite verses right now. I hope they encourage you too.

-E

I consider myself a home-school success story.

My parents made the decision to home-school myself and my three siblings from kindergarten all the way through highschool. My entire education was undertaken by my parents. Wholly. My mother gave up anything that resembles a career working outside the home to instill in her four children a Christian worldview while educating all of us. Many people are surprised when they find out I’m a home-schooler. But I am. To the core. With everything but the socks and horn-rimmed glasses.

Most people are surprised because I have friends. In fact, I can even be outgoing when I choose. It’s true, I do prefer spending a quiet evening at home working on a project or reading a book (the kind with chapters in it *wink wink*) but I can attend a party without turning into a wallflower. I got married. He’s a stud. I like to wear pencil skirts, high heels, I know how to apply mascara. I went to college. Graduated at 19. With honors. Sure, I’m not the CEO of some multi-million dollar company, but that’s because I chose to support my husband as he got his Master’s degree. I work full-time, pay my taxes, and generally act as a contributing member of society. I don’t want a career in some skyscraper building downtown. I want to have babies and home-school those babies. I want to instill in my children a Christian worldview while educating all of them. I want to be just like my mother when I grow up.

That hasn’t necessarily always been the case. I remember butting heads with my mom so many times. It’s unbelievable she never whacked me over the head with a shovel and buried my body in the woods somewhere. It’s most certainly what I deserved. I smarted off to her whenever I got the chance. Especially during those teenage years. I was a rascal. But my mom was always a faithful and patient teacher. Working with me slowly and gently through hours of math. In college, I ended up with an A in every math or science class I took. Those hours paid off. Like an adolescent with the obligatory attitude problem, I also gave my mom grief over literature. I didn’t want to write another stinking paper. Don’t even get me started on poetry. I skimmed that junk. My mom however asked those probing questions and caught me in the act of skimming every time. You can’t do that in a classroom of twenty kids. There’s no way to confront each kid individually and figure out they used the Cliff’s Notes version of a literary masterpiece to finish their homework. My mom could, and did.

I say all of this as a thank-you. A thank-you to my mom. And to all the home-school moms out there. Thank you for giving up the high-powered job to be locked in the house all day long. Thank you for giving up the adorable skirt suit for an art smock. Thank you for leaving your pride behind when your daughter is having a math-induced meltdown. Thank you for having grace when someone says “oh, you’re just a stay-at-home mom.” There is no “just” about. You’ve taken on the most trying job in the world, and you’re doing great. We may not tell you this while you’re requiring us to read Hamlet and memorize the periodic chart, but we are so incredibly thankful. For all that you do.

Mom, you’re the best. I appreciate that now. I’m sorry for all the threats of running away, accusations of you ruining my life, and arguments that public school is way cooler. I realize now that I was spoiled. I received the best education I could ever ask for. Thank you mom for your sacrifice. I appreciate learning to teach myself. I love that you let me sleep in, so my body would develop and grow. For looking the other way while I stayed up way too late trying to finish another chapter of Pride & Prejudice. Thank you for trying to correct my handwriting. Thank for not leaving me on the street corner waiting for the bus. Thank you for the field trips, the science experiments, and days spent reading on the couch. You’ve made me a home-school success story.

And someday, I hope to be just like you. Parenting my own home-school success story.

Thank you.

-E

***WARNING***

The following post includes cat pajamas. MY cat pajamas. You’ve been warned.

Y’all, I have the best friends. The proof is right here in this post. If you can be seen with me in public in my cat pajamas then you deserve to be given friend-of-the-year award. Toss in the fact that I wore no (ZERO) make-up, rolled out of bed 10 minutes before we left so I’d have time to brush my teeth, and gathered the troops together for photographic evidence and you’ll have the picture of this year’s Good Friday celebrations.

To all of those deeply spiritual types who fasted on Good Friday my hat is off to you. Just don’t look at my hair, it’s part of my cat-pajama look. My approach to Easter this year has been different. More celebratory. Maybe I’ll go deep next year. Maybe my lover will burn these pajamas. You never know.

This post is going nowhere fast.

Ehem, in an attempt to reel in this wordfest let me tell you about this plan. I absolutely l.o.v.e. “yes” people. You know what I’m talking about, the kind of people who are up for anything. I feel that I am this type of person and, well, birds of a feather, right? So anyways, my lover and I have these friends who are just those type of people. So when I said “hey, let’s go to breakfast in our pajamas” they were all like “sure, sounds good.” Actually I think us gals were like that. The guys married us. And so this happened:

CAT PAJAMAS!!!!!!!!!!

Meee-owww. (Pun totally intended)

Lover’s p.j.s were a little more fierce than mine. A little.

We went to a land flowing with coffee and crepes. Cafe Brazil is a fun & funky local dining place with the best crepes EVER. Need proof? BOOM:

I dare you not to salivate right now. Four crepes, stuffed with all kinds of citrus-y and sweet fruits, smothered in sauces, and then heavily dusted with powdered sugar. The bomb.com, for rizzle. And of course, there was coffee.

Cafe Brazil offers a bottomless coffee bar with lots of flavor options. It was lover’s first experience there, I just had to capture him deciding which delicious option to try first.

I had like 3 cups. And then took a cup to go. It was the most enjoyable bad idea I’ve ever had. For a girl who labels herself a “social drinker” when it comes to coffee I consumed way too much caffeine. It felt like a million fairies doing military drills inside my veins for the rest of the day. Turns out that much caffeine is uncomfortable.

Next, go home. Take a nap. Clean your house. Get ready for dinner.

OH. MY. WORD.

Dinner.

My lover has been learning to grill lately. We got a charcoal grill for Christmas via a gift card that my sweet mother in law gave us. I would like to be mature and tell you I love charcoal for the wonderful flavor and authentic grilling taste it gives food, but the truth is I like to roast marshmallows when the coals are first lit on fire. Which of course we did. Who wouldn’t?

We’ve made some chicken on this new grill and it’s been good. But friends, this steak. I can’t, I just, I need a minute. Maybe five minutes. These steaks were so good. Lover called a friend who is the definition of a foody. Those people are good to know. In my mind, they are the people who make the world go ’round. So on top of steaks we put together a relative feast including corn, potatoes, bread, and dessert. We ladies even set the table. And then, we ate. And ate. And ate.

And that, my friends, is how you eat your way through a day off. Not bad, eh?

Now it’s time for a little poll. How do you pronounce those things you sleep in? Are they pa-JOM-as or are they pa-JAM-as? I’m pretty sure mine are paJAMas. The hubster wears paJOMas. They look pretty much the same to me.

There has been much radio silence around this here little bloggy. That’s because I’ve not been my usual let’s-talk-about-nonsense-and-make-fun-of-life self. I’ve been fighting the urge to type out these ranting posts about all my pet peeves and all my worries and all these things that I don’t even want to read about, much less subject you to. This week however I was asked if I’m still doing this blog and I knew right then I needed to get my gluteus maximus in gear and get some things written down. Wednesday seemed just the day to do so.

Here goes.

(Sorry but this might be a toughy. I’ve been convicted.)

Let’s talk about prayer. I’ll go first. My prayer life stinks. I’m super good at remembering to thank God for things throughout the day and even throw up little prayers for patience or peace or whatnot. Not so good at sitting down with Jesus and having that deep, heartfelt, well-hello-there-best-friend-here-is-my-life conversation that I so desperately need and Jesus so desires to have. That time of communion with the Lord has been deeply lacking.

Enter 31 Days of Prayer by Ruth & Warren Meyers, stage left.

Ten days in, this book has already been a life-changer. I’ve been super blessed to have a darling friend who has committed along with me to go through this book. We meet together regularly and talk about all that we have learned, how we’ve changed our behaviors/attitudes in regards to prayer, and just plainly shared burdens with one another. It’s been amazing.

I shared with her, and now I’ll share with the world (because all the world is reading this blog, right?) what I learned on day 7. I have no idea what the title is for that day. All I know is what the Lord taught and is teaching me.

And it all has to do with my desires.

The Bible says this,

I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that you present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable to God, which is your reasonable service. And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God. Romans 12:1-2

I want you to focus in with me on the very first sentence. Paul beseeches believers to present themselves as a living sacrifice. According to Dictionary.com to beseech means to “implore urgently” or to “beg eagerly for.” Some translations use the word urge. This very intense plea I think show the importance of offering oneself up in service to the Lord, as a living sacrifice. An active, living, breathing sacrifice.

How does one become a living sacrifice? By daily, DAILY offering oneself up to Christ. To be used as his servant. Including everything. Talents, physical abilities, resources, your future, your desires.

For me, this word “desires” was becoming a stumbling block. Reading through day 7 in 31 Days of Prayer the thing that jumped at me were my desires. That they were just that. They were my desires. What I wanted. How I wanted my future to look. My deep, sometimes overwhelming desire to be a mother. Those were all mine. Not Christ’s.

The Bible says,

But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you. Matthew 6:33

My desires should be to seek God’s kingdom first. Not to pursue my own desires. What I want. What I feel I need. My desire should be to further advance God’s kingdom. And that desire comes through daily giving up more of myself to Him. My prayer, in those intimate moments with the Lord, is for Him to mold my heart to His own. That He will remove my selfish, earth-driven desires and replace them with His own righteous and holy desires. That I will be more like Him. That I will be less like myself.

I’m giving my desires over to the Lord.

-E

{Photo via Shelly Weaver Photography}

I won’t tell you how old she is, but just between us it rhymes with shmenty shmoo.

I just love her. My baby sister (if you haven’t caught on by now, I’m the oldest of the kiddos, they are all my babies) is also my bestest friend. And although we are almost nothing alike, we have so much in common. This letter is to her on her birthday.

Hannah,

When did all this happen? When did you grow up and become all lady-like and adultish? What happened to all those years playing together in the backyard? I was Sissa, you were Kelly. Heaven only knows where we came up with those names. We had so much fun with our alter egos. Hours were spent swinging on that old tree swing. And in our tree house. We had a blooming tree house!!! How cool was that? I’m pretty sure I bossed you around more than you deserved. Or at least tried to. You were pretty feisty though, always able to hold your own. You just kept growing up so fast.

When did all this happen? In all seriousness, it was like last summer that we were headed to summer camp with our friends, laughing it up and having the time of our lives. You always kept everyone entertained. You were so funny, and so honest. You said absolutely everything that popped into your head. I’m pretty sure all the boys liked you. Actually scratch that. I know all the boys liked you.

When did all this happen? I went to college. Then you went to college. I remember vividly the night you called me freaking out because WebMD said you had thyroid cancer. I remember it because I missed you so bad and was legitimately worried you might be dying of cancer. That was before you admitted that the other possibility was strep throat. And you’re still alive so we all know how that ended.

When did all this happen? You were the most beautiful (and wonderful!) maid of honor in the whole world. I know it. You fretted and fussed over every little detail that weekend, to make sure it was fun and full of memories that would last forever. Your ability to locate and pose for any camera of the room is well demonstrated in the pictures from that day. You always had on your best smile.

When did all this happen? You graduated college, smartie-pants, and then you landed a job that has you on the fast track to an awesome career. I knew you’d be great at whatever you did. You’re so good with people, I’m fairly convinced you’ve never met a stranger in your whole life. You get that from our father. Whom you are becoming more and more like every day. I’m expecting really awesome (i.e. expensive) Christmas presents from you in the next couple of years. Since you will probably be running your own company or something. And you’ll probably be married to some hot multimillionaire. He had better be a pretty amazing guy. Which he’ll have to be, to pass my test. I plan on giving him a pretty thorough shake-down. Any possible suitor be warned. I’m watching.

When did all this happen? I don’t really know. All I know is you’re an amazing, incredible, gorgeous young woman and I am so glad/proud/blessed to call you my baby sister. I love you.

The hugest ever birthday hugs and wishes from me,

-E

Recently, I had to delete a drafted post I had written. I had called it my “hush hush” post. It was the story of how we learned that we were pregnant. It would have been our first pregnancy, and we were waiting until our first doctor’s visit to announce.

But that visit never came, and that draft never got published. By every educated guess, we were between five and six weeks when I miscarried. Just enough time to get really excited about this baby. I had ordered books from amazon, we told our parents, I even started a secret board on pinterest called “preggers.” It’s not uncommon for women to miscarry in their first trimester, so we knew that losing the baby was a very real possibility. Still, I was eaten up with the hope that everything would go smoothly and we’d be holding our first child by October.

And then that day happened.

I knew something was off. My body was already doing some unusual things as it prepared for pregnancy, but that morning was different. It was wrong. I went to work like normal, keeping an eye out for unusual acitvity, dreading what was becoming more and more of a probability than a possibility. A huge blessing of my job is the opportunity to attend a chapel service during the day. God knew what I needed. What I had to hear to be prepared for what was coming. You can listen to the sermon here, it’s the one from February 12. God was just stockpiling in my heart a balm for the sadness that was to come. One of Dr. Reccord’s points came from Matthew 14:25,

 Now in the fourth watch of the night Jesus went to them, walking on the sea.

I’ve been very, very, very blessed in my life not to be thrust into the midst of tragedy very often. Miscarrying this baby has been one of the hardest things I’ve personally been through. It has been one of the darkest experiences of my life. But listening to that sermon, I was encouraged that this time would be exactly when God would reveal Himself. The Lord knew when I would desperately feel the need for Him in my life. He knew how I would need to be comforted. God wasn’t surprised with the way I responded to the situation. He already had a good and a perfect plan in place, all I had to do was follow Him through this journey called miscarriage.

And let me tell you, I want you to hear loud and clear, I’ve had one of the most blessed times with the Lord. I cannot even begin to express how sweet my relationship with the Lord has been the last few weeks. It’s been a time of prayer, a time of weeping, a  time of crying out, a time even of confession. I have craved time with the Lord so much these last few weeks, that even in a time of mourning the Lord has revealed to me sin in my life that had to be dealt with. I’ve learned so much about the gentle, loving side of the Lord. Clinging to the Lord throughout all this sadness has made it so bearable. Not easy, I still cry intermittently and sometimes for no apparent reason, but the Bible says that Jesus is our friend who sticks closer than a brother and it is so true.

Now, in order to give these overwhelming thoughts and feelings some semblance of order, I would like to list some of the things that I have learned throughout this time.

1. God is the Great Comforter. The Bible says,

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. For as we share abundantly in Christ’s sufferings, so through Christ we share abundantly in comfort too. 2 Corinthians 1:3-5

I’ve read 2 Corinthians before. These verses aren’t completely unknown to me. Yet they became very real during this miscarriage. God didn’t stop being mighty or righteous and He wasn’t any less great but during these weeks His presence as a comforter became the most recognizable characteristic of the Lord for me.

2. It’s okay to let others minister to you. I think this was one of the hardest lessons for me to grasp, and it took my patient and precious husband pointing it out to get me to understand. Everyone has been very kind and we know that we have been prayed for extensively these last weeks. We had some very sweet and loving friends offer to bring us a meal one night. I confess my first reaction was oh no that’s not necessary. I didn’t want to be a burden. But my lover pointed out that this was an opportunity for other believers to minister as God has called them to and refusing would be unwise. In the end we were not only provided a meal, but given encouragement and once again assured that we were being prayed for.

3. Grief only lasts for a little while. The Bible says,

Sing praises to the Lord, O you his saints,
    and give thanks to his holy name.
For his anger is but for a moment,
    and his favor is for a lifetime.
Weeping may tarry for the night,
    but joy comes with the morning. Psalm 30:4-5

Notice that it doesn’t say not to grieve. But the Bible also does not say that you are supposed to grieve forever. The promise here is that joy will come, and that grief only lasts for a short time.

My lover and I both want to use our experience during this time to minister to others. We want others to know that clinging to the Lord through a difficult time is absolutely the best way to deal with grief. And I want other women who have experienced the tragedy of miscarriage to know that you are not alone. There are all kinds of statistics and numbers out there that are supposed to tell you how normal this is, how commonly miscarriage happens. For me that wasn’t enough. I needed the chance to talk with other women who have been through a similar experience. It breaks my heart to hear how many women have gone through just this very thing, and if this describes you I want you to know I am praying for you.

***I have kept this worship Wednesday post focused on my relationship with Christ through this difficult time. However I do want to leave this quick note to assure you that I am healthy and physically doing very well. We are hoping that soon we’ll be able to invite you to rejoice with us in expecting a child. Until that time we thank you from the bottom of our hearts for your continued prayers and words of encouragement. Praise be to the Lord.***

He was an ah-may-ZING man of God. I’ve heard the story before, but this week in Sunday School it was once again brought to my attention. It’s one of the greatest stories of God’s provision in recent history that I have heard. This man by the grace of God was able to care for countless orphans throughout his life. And God provided for their needs countless times. One time in particular is my favorite…

It was 19th century England, early one morning, as the whole orphanage full of young children and caretakers alike sat down to breakfast. There was no food. Not a crumb to be found. Nothing on the tables, nothing in the kitchen, nada. George Muller asked that they all bow their heads so that they may offer up thanks to the Lord for providing and to bless the food. Moments after the prayer was finished, a knock came at the door. And there stood the baker, who had baked more loaves than needed and was asking if the orphanage could use them. As the bread was being delivered, another knock revealed the milkman, whose carriage had broken down outside the orphanage. He needed to find a use for the milk before it spoiled, and asked if the orphanage could make use of the jars of fresh milk. And for breakfast all were fed.

Now I’ve heard the story before, and maybe you have too, but this week I was struck with a thought that I had never had before. I was struck by how George Muller and those orphans had a need that God met.

And then I thought about my “needs.”

And I realized they looked more like my “wants.”

I feel like I “need” a new pair of black heels. My current ones have seen better days, I should probably replace them. But you know what? Those shoes do the job. They keep my feet warm and dry. Sure, they’re a bit scuffed up and the soles are thin, but they’re not falling apart. There aren’t any holes. In fact, I’m sure nobody but me notices that they are sparkling brand new. That’s really a want.

And sometimes I think we “need” a new vehicle. You know, because the TWO that we have sometimes need brakes replaced, or new windshield wipers, or squeak a little at stop signs. I have it in my mind that that’s not good enough. The truth is that IS good enough. We have plenty. That vehicle may not win at a car show but it reliably gets me from point A to B. I get to work on time every morning.

And speaking of work, that job is a huge provision that the Lord blesses me with every.single.day.  He’s provided for so many things in advance just by providing a place for me to make an income and provide for us. Jesus says in Luke,

Do not worry about your life, what you will eat; nor about the body, what you will put on. Life is more than food, and the body is more than clothing. Consider the ravens, for they neither sow nor reap, which have neither storehouse nor barn; and God feeds them. Of how much more value are you than the birds…And do not seek what you should eat or what you should drink, nor have an anxious mind. For all these things the nations of the world seek after, and your Father knows that you need these things. But seek the kingdom of God, and all these things^[c] shall be added to you.

Luke 12:22-24 & 29-31

There’s so much packed into these verses! Instruction, a promise, encouragement. We can learn that we are more important to God than anything else He created. And yet we sit here and we worry about how we will be provided for. As if God is going to see to it that the ravens are fed and let us starve.

He’s so not! He loves us so much He is never going to let us go un-provided for. That provision doesn’t mean that the Lord sits at the table and cuts our prime rib for us, it means He goes before us and prepares our way. The Lord desires to greatly bless His children, and does, we’re just sometimes too thick-headed to see the forest through the trees.

So meditat on these verses, and tell me, what do you really need?

Can you tell now why I refer to my little brother who is six years younger than me as my “big” brother? It’s because he’s more than half a foot taller than me. I’m not really sure when that happened. In honor of his birthday, here is a letter to him…

Dear Josiah,

I’m not really sure when a lot of things happened. The last thing I remember you were brought home from the hospital. We loved you instantly. Your sisters wanted to do everything for you. Hold you, feed you, play with you. Heck, I even remember secretly changing your diaper one time because we wanted to be your mom. And by “we” I mean your two older sisters. In a moment you became the center of our lives.

I’m not really sure when you stopped being a baby. It must have happened pretty fast. Before anyone realized what was happening you were off to the races. You climbed trees with us, you ran in circles in the yard with the dog, suddenly you wanted your toy gun collection to be stored with our barbies. Then you were potty-trained and there was no more secretly changing your diapers.

I’m not really sure when you started having an opinion of your own. We got you to dress up like a girl at least a couple of times before then. But then you started bringing your lightsabers into the mix and we just didn’t know what to do with that. You started to make friends. I’m pretty sure you were funny from the moment you could talk. And could do better tricks on the trampoline. You started sledding down the hill by yourself, reading books with chapters, and building your own fort in the woods. When did that happen?

I’m not really sure when you started into a teenager. You had lots of friends, you were so smart, and still very very funny. I moved away to college and it’s like you got put on one of those stretching torture devices. You were so. much. taller. all of a sudden. I remember coming home for Christmas one year. You met me in the airport and I didn’t even recognize you. You had this deep manly voice and you were taller than me. All those years when I tickled you to death and they said one day you’d be bigger than me I didn’t believe them. Until that moment. When you were, in fact, bigger than me. I had lots of explaining to do.

I’m not really sure when you grew up, graduated high school, and turned into the big man on campus. You’re still so smart, so funny, and have lots of friends. All of a sudden you’re making big decisions like what you want to do with your life and stuff. You have the most precious girlfriend. I’m glad she’s great because I would hate to have to kill you if you had a terrible girlfriend. So good choice. I told you that you were a smart kid. Ehem, young man.

I’m not really sure when you turned into a young man!?!?! How did this happen?

Regardless, I want to wish you a giant happy birthday. I’m so proud of you.

Happy b-day.

Love,

-E

He’s a lot taller now. Like as in, taller than me. And he’s now sixteen. Today he turns 16. So in his honor, I’d like to write him a letter. Grab a kleenux everyone. Here it goes…

Dear Nathan,

You grew up too fast. I was pretty sure yesterday was the day you were born. I remember it clearly. Grammy was watching us while mom & dad were at the hospital. Another brother. That made four of us. Four of us and we each thought we were an only child. Our poor mother. Your sisters already considered ourselves to be your second mother. We couldn’t wait to play with you, to hold you, to feed you.

You grew up too fast. Next thing I knew you were walking. Gosh, you were our baby and already you were up on your feet making your own way in the world. We dragged you into everything. Unfortunately since you were the youngest you also got talked into doing the worst things. Like the one (or more) times we dressed you up as the groom in our play weddings. Sorry about that. We feel sheepish.

You grew up too fast. Next thing I knew you had your own mind and didn’t want to do what we told you. I knew how to take care of that. I called it my sisterly duty. I pinned you down and tickled you until you couldn’t breathe. Remember those good times? I do. Man we had fun. Right?

You grew up too fast. I went away to college one day and left you as a little boy. I came back and you had a mohawk. WHAT THE..??? You were cool and girls thought you were cute. Excuse me ladies but that’s MY brother and only the prettiest, funniest, and nicest need apply. I will physically maim all others. I got married, moved away, only saw you once or twice a year. You got taller and taller. Your voice got deep. You sound just like dad now. In fact, when I call sometimes you impersonate him. I can’t tell the difference.

You grew up too fast. Some crazy person gave you car keys and a driver’s license. I would say that’s ridiculous, but the fact is you are probably a better driver than me. And I have a license. Apparently they’ll give one to just about anybody these days. You have lots of interests, like movies and music and good food. Before too long you’ll be making plans for college. Then you’ll meet some pretty young lady. And you’ll do things like buy her flowers and pay for her meals. Oh gosh and then you’ll get married, and have kids that look just like you. And they’ll grow up fast too and I’ll just sit here feeling old.

It all just happened so fast.

I’m so proud of you Nathan and I love you so much. I’m so glad you’re my brother. I hope your birthday is the best yet, and that they just keep on getting better and better.

Happy birthday.

Love,

E

I took 175 photos of this room. I deleted all but the few here in this post. Also I have a new camera that I apparently don’t know how to use, so these photos are small. It makes me sad but there’s no way this room will ever be clean enough to re-shoot so small photos it is.

Hold onto your hats ladies & gents, I’m about to show you the “before.”

OH MY GOSH MY EYES!!! THEY BUUUURRRRNNNN!!!

That was a bit dramatic. But it’s pretty much how I feel about this photo. And that’s pretty much how our bedroom looked for almost 4 years. No wonder we don’t have any children yet. That monstrosity isn’t exactly a mood setter. Well it is a mood setter, it’s just a grumpy mood is all.

You can click here for the post about re-doing the headboard. And you can click here for the tutorial on the ever-popular giant canvas photograph. The dresser makeover can be found if you click here. Our chandelier can be found by clicking here. And if you’re just looking for inspiration for your own neutrally goodness you can check out this post here.

Okay now I think we’ve all waited long enough, here is the grand reveal…

Well thar she blows maties!!

She looks pretty good, although when I look at these pictures I see about five thousand, one hundred and eighty-two things I would like to change/improve. For example, that dresser is looking sparse up top.

Instead of going through the “one day I’m so on that” list, I want to share with you my favorite things! First off, I’m in l.o.v.e. with our “chandelier.”

I think the fact that it’s flowy and soft is just amazing. Because of the neutral whites & greys it doesn’t block too much light, just softens the harshness from before. Perfecto! *mwah*

Every time I walk into the room I feel the need to pause a moment and just look at these shelves:

They add so much height on that side of the room and perfectly balance the heavy burlap curtains from the other side of our bedroom. Plus, I like playing with how they’re arranged every now and again. Especially the top shelf. That top shelf makes me drool.

My absolutest most favoritest part of the room ever though is this corner:

Remember a couple weeks ago in this post that I confessed I had already spent my decorating budget for January & February? Well, I completely blame that reflective beauty in the corner. She’s a total babe. She hails from the land of HomeGoods, and thanks to my overly generous parents she’s mine! Thanks mom & dad. I paid for most of her with the gift card y’all gave me. She’s so perfect. I just love her in this corner. It’s my side of the bed, so when I roll out of dreamland and into the world of the waking she greets me and tells me it’s going to be okay. She also reminds me that I look like a tramp first thing in the morning and not to leave the house until I’m presentable. She’s trustworthy like that.

Oh and she’s a skinny mirror. Meaning objects in the mirror appear skinnier than they actually are. I just love that.

So there it is. Sweat and tears. No blood. Blood would stain the comforter.